Remember when I had my hair shaved on one side of my head, wore clothing all the wrong sizes, and hated everyone my age? Remember when I joined the golf team? Very upstanding! But I never broke 100, and felt dumb with the other girls, and played one tournament, then had a panic attack in the van for the next…
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Do you listen to Hidden Brain? I love it so much, and incidentally, if I could have every interesting thing I learn read to me by Shankar Vedantam, I would grab that opportunity right quick. In this episode from a while back, guest Cal Newport shares part of the little ritual he uses to step away from work mode and…
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My daughter and I went on a mini trip by ourselves… and it was WARM! There’s nothing like the first warm day. We’ve been inside, bundled, too little movement and too many snacks, since November. We’ve been in each other’s space, in each other’s business, on each other’s nerves. We’ve been tired. So tired. And then today. Today was the…
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My feet haven’t touched grass since September. Heck, until yesterday even my shoes hadn’t touched grass since December sometime. My skin hasn’t felt the cool pool, nor have my toes touched sand, since August. I haven’t been married for over a year. I haven’t worked from my office in 729 days. Exactly. I haven’t eaten banana pudding since 2013. It…
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This week I am… Driving kids places, again and again endlessly Resisting dessert some days, eating three brownies another Rearranging furniture in my basement, making a sewing space, reorganizing the supplies, so much aspirationally-purchased fabric it fills a dresser, yet I have sewn exactly once in this house since I moved in Selling off furniture I bought used in a…
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From my table in the corner of the trampoline park… I see boys somersaulting over barriers I hear a little girl repeating “Mommy, watch me! Watch me!” I see a cool dad inventing jump challenges for a lucky son I hear a squeaky voice yelling, “Keep going! I’m jumping to space!” I see moms zoning out on their phones at…
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He forgot to read his book for school today. This he realized as he was putting on shoes to leave for school this morning after a leisurely four-day weekend. Instantly he transformed, from boisterous, cheerful almost-middle-school weirdo to panicked, shame-filled, sobbing nine year old. Oh, my child. I know how it feels. I know how it feels to find myself…
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I wrote tonight. Before that, I wrote with a group of teachers, all tired from a long day, a long winter, a long year, all brave and committing to write together. Before that, I quickly ate the chicken with peanut sauce, brown rice, snap peas and potstickers that I had made. On my son’s plate was just the chicken, plain.…